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Old 09-25-2007, 11:17 PM
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How do you really know when you should end a marriage? I have a two year old and really want more kids but I havent been truly happy in my marriage. I feel like we are more business partners or even siblings or good friends but just don't feel the love connection. We have been together for over 10 years and I just find it harder and harder to deal with things as the time goes by. I really have a hard time with my in-laws and it is a source of great arguments for us. At this point, I can't bring myself to be around them and I have told him I just don't love him enough to do it. At the same time I feel terrible because if he wants to he should but he wont without me. I really really really want more kids but I don't want to bring them in to a marriage that wont last and I also don't want to share anymore kids with these awful inlaws. I'm terrified of leaving my comfort zone that I have been in for the last 10 years and telling my world that my marriage failed. My family loves him. Please give me some advice???
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Old 09-27-2007, 12:54 PM
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SIA SIA is offline
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it's a difficult situation to be in.
but it takes two to tango... what i mean is, both have to be ready to give a little, make compromises both ways, to make it work. it doesn't all depend on one person.
plus you're still confused as to what you want to do, separate or not. you don't want to give up what you have, but you're not happy with what you have... i think you should really take some time to think this through, assess your feelings and get to the bottom of your heart. it's only then you'll really know what you want.
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Old 10-12-2007, 04:56 PM
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Don't have any more children until you sort this out. There are many resources out there to assist with troubled marriages. Talk to you partner and explore them together.
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Old 10-23-2007, 10:48 AM
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talking obviously helps, and if need arises, then one can opt for counseling too. nothing wrong in going that way if at the end it can save your marriage.
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Old 10-23-2007, 04:06 PM
Vivvie Vivvie is offline
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I know exactly how you feel and I, myself, am coming to the realization that perhaps I deserve to be happy. As ironic as it sounds, I believe that it is that "comfort zone" that keeps so many people in uncomfortable situatuations and "bad" marriages. When that "bad" marriage is all you know, where DO you go from there? When you hit rock bottom the only way is up, right? I'm still trying to believe this myself ...
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Old 10-24-2007, 06:54 PM
ingrid ingrid is offline
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Adjust expectations. Only YOU can make yourself happy. I divorced three years ago after 17 years. HUGE mistake. My ex and I both want to get back together but we are in rebound marriages.....There is so much happiness and comfort in remaining in a relationship that has memories, good times and bad, as well as connection. The grass will definitely not be greener. Stay married, get to the "us" and give your child an intact, loving family. Takes initiative, adjusting expectations, and finding inner peace and happiness within yourself.
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