Hi all,
My name is John , I’m new to the forum and just want to say hi to everyone.

I just finished filing for custody a 2nd time since my divorce. I too left an emotionally and physically abusive marriage years ago. My ex was rewarded with custody because I had nothing, he'd left after I asked for a divorce, taking everything I had as well as my children. After so much time has passed since living each day with out them, the pain never stops and only increases it when you try to get them back. I'm not a bad person, I didn't hurt my children, I didn't put them in bad situations, I didnt do drugs or drink....I love my children with all of my heart and I work hard for an honest living. My ex husband was and is still a bum, living off of my child support for my children and money from his finacially comfortable mother. The court, however, doesn't see this.
Survival is a must and sometimes that's all that keeps me hanging on. I have since remarried to a wonderful man and he's very understanding and it does help me more than I could say. As far as being able to go on....I don't think it's ever possible because not a day goes by that I don't think about my children every second of every day. I'm constantly left with a feeling of guilt for thinking I could have done something more.
If anyone does have a suggestion or two on how to get through each day, that would be great. I will admit though, it is nice to see there are other women out there like me in the same situation.